The Novels, Poetry, and Ramblings of a man grateful for A.D.H.D.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
The Gasping Heart
I heard when you said you liked my new clothes
Tossing off your words, Neurosis I chose
A huge vacuum of self loathing consumes all
It was not your words but me I appall
Nothing you say will draw me from my pain
Why do you strive with efforts in vain?
Please don't go, I want you to stay
But I hope in the end I will drive you away
Contradiction of who I am and would be
Violations and neglect circumvent me
Pain is what I feel when I open the door
Shutting you out is a must that I abhor
I have refused to believe that I am choosing
Hope is a fairytale I am fast losing
Passivity croons lullabies to my angry heart
Even though I wish a proactive new start
Can't you see that I'm fast drowning?
In spite of medication that I'm downing?
Get out, just leave, no please hold me close
Another lives inside that I just can't oppose
How can I be something other than me?
When the little one inside won't set me free?
Give me a chance; at least toss me a line
I can't handle your rejection, no I'm fine -- P J Casselman
P. J. Casselman
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